The primary defining characteristic of shyness is a largely ego-driven fear of what other people will think of a person's behavior. This results in a person becoming scared of doing or saying what he or she wants to out of fear of negative reactions, being laughed at or humiliated, criticism, and/or rejection. A shy person may simply opt to avoid social situations instead.
One important aspect of shyness is social skills development. Schools and parents may implicitly assume children are fully capable of effective social interaction. Social skills training is not given any priority (unlike reading and writing) and as a result, shy students are not given an opportunity to develop their ability to participate in class and interact with peers. Teachers can model social skills and ask questions in a less direct and intimidating manner in order to gently encourage shy students to speak up in class, and make friends with other children
What are the advantages & disadvantages of being shy ?
The advantage is the you've learned how to really listen - which is something many non-shy people don't know how to do. You gain sensitivity and compassion for other people - so you learn how to notice people who others would pass over. You also learn how to think deeply and reflectively because everything is taking place internally and you also learn how to give good advice. Plus, I think because you have to be so reflective and you observe a lot, you become a good judge of character.
The disadvantage is that sometimes people think that if you don't say anything you have no opinion, or worse, that you are stupid. Sometimes though the reverse occurs though, if you talk a little bit - but have something insightful to say - they'll think that you are wise. The feelings of being being afraid, stammering, etc. are also very uncomfortable. If you are very shy, you might have problems doing normal things, like dating, going out to dinner, meeting new people, getting a new job, etc. The danger is that you'll let the feelings of being afraid dominate your life and you never get a chance to live your dreams.
It is possible though to learn to be less shy. A lot of it is just getting comfortable with yourself and taking baby steps. If it is a severe case, you can always get help. But there's nothing wrong with being quieter or a little shy - everybody is different.
The disadvantage is that sometimes people think that if you don't say anything you have no opinion, or worse, that you are stupid. Sometimes though the reverse occurs though, if you talk a little bit - but have something insightful to say - they'll think that you are wise. The feelings of being being afraid, stammering, etc. are also very uncomfortable. If you are very shy, you might have problems doing normal things, like dating, going out to dinner, meeting new people, getting a new job, etc. The danger is that you'll let the feelings of being afraid dominate your life and you never get a chance to live your dreams.
It is possible though to learn to be less shy. A lot of it is just getting comfortable with yourself and taking baby steps. If it is a severe case, you can always get help. But there's nothing wrong with being quieter or a little shy - everybody is different.
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