Thursday, March 28, 2013

Tap water in a part of our country


Dirty and Dangerous Water Threatens Country’s Health

A family living in Batey 9 on the Dominican Republic’s border with Haiti washes clothes and bathes in the untreated but free water of the village’s communal cistern.
A family living in Batey 9 on the Dominican Republic’s border with Haiti washes clothes and bathes in the untreated but free water of the village’s communal cistern. Photo by Lindsay Erin Lough
BY BASTIEN INZAURRALDE
Cronkite Borderlands Initiative
BATEY NINE, Dominican Republic – Christin Morin has to stop and think about the last time he drank water that was really clean.
It’s been a couple of months since the 54-year-old agricultural worker and his wife had a few spare pesos to buy chlorine or potable water, so they rely on water from the Batey 9 village tank. The water is free and accessible but also dirty and dangerous.
Birds sometimes get trapped in a tiny hole in the tank and die inside. When villagers turn on faucets in their homes, they may get a sickening mixture of water, feathers and dirt.
Clean water is available but largely unaffordable for the impoverished residents of
Batey 9.
SLIDESHOW: Clean water is available but largely unaffordable for the impoverished residents of Batey 9.
Running water and drinkable water are not synonymous here.
“The water doesn’t receive the treatment that is needed to make it suitable for human consumption,” said David Perez Julis, mayor of the municipal district that oversees bateyes 7, 8 and 9, where nearly 700 Haitians have settled since the 2010 earthquake in their country.
“At times, some women have come to me and told me, ‘I turned the faucet on in my house to drink water and I saw small birds and water insects,’” Julis said.
Waterborne diseases – often the result of poor sanitation and lack of treated, drinkable water – that are a rarity elsewhere are common in Independencia, the poverty-stricken province where Batey 9 is located, near the border with Haiti.
Julis said the recent arrival of so many Haitian immigrants in these villages — the three bateyes have a total population of 5,000 – have made already poor sanitary conditions and the lack of access to drinkable water even worse.
“Health issues started to become more acute, as families with boys and girls arrived in not so good condition,” he said.
In addition, an outbreak of cholera Haiti in late 2010 that killed nearly 5,000 people prompted widespread concern that the disease would spread to the Dominican Republic. This year, there have been 1,681 confirmed cases of cholera and 56 deaths in the Dominican Republic as of June 18, according to the General Directorate of Epidemiology of the Dominican Ministry of Public Health.
Border Water Contamination
VIDEO: Drinking contaminated water can cause widespread illness and even death. But many Dominicans have no other option.
Those fears are most acute in border provinces such as Independencia, according to the Ministry of Public Health.
While cholera raises alarms, however, diarrhea is a much more common health problem. A nuisance in the U.S., diarrhea causes half the deaths of children under age 1 in the Dominican Republic, according to the Pan American Health Organization.
And in places like Independencia, the problems are even worse. A little more than 21 percent of children in the province contracted diarrhea over a two-week period, compared to 14.7 percent of children in the rest of the country, according to the 2007 Demographics and Health Report by the Dominican Center for Social and Demographical Studies. The mortality rate in the province was 44 deaths per 1,000 children under 5 in 2007, compared to a national rate of 36 percent, according to The Dominican National Office of Statistics.
Low levels of vaccination for common diarrheal diseases are part of the problem. Fewer than half the children in Independencia get a full series of vaccinations, according to the National Office of Statistics, and 7 percent get no vaccines at all.
The most recent child death was last year in Batey 8, when a mother settled in the community with a child who was already weak and later died of complications from diarrhea, said Beneco Enecia, former mayor of the three bateyes and head of the non-profit Center for Sustainable Development.
Citizens of bateyes – immigrant communities in the Dominican Republic — often live in extreme poverty. Many of the community’s children are made sick by contaminated water.
Many citizens of bateyes — immigrant communities in the Dominican Republic — have no access to clean drinking water. Photo by Lindsay Erin Lough
Alexandra Ramirez Aquino, a nurse in Batey 8’s clinic, said impure water is responsible for most of the diarrhea in the community.
“It’s not purified or they don’t boil it. They don’t chlorinate it and the children get sick. It causes them diarrhea,” she said.
Ramirez Aquino's clinic, called a Unit of Primary Care, is a small, under-stocked building of the Dominican Ministry of Public Health that is reachable only by dirt roads. The clinic has one doctor and five nurses to serve nearly 5,000 area residents. A dermatologist comes every Tuesday, as contaminated water also causes skin problems.
Patients needing treatment that can’t be provided by the clinic are either sent to the hospital in nearby Tamayo or to a bigger health center in the neighboring province of Barahona.
Rosa-Helena Feliz, a teacher who also works as a health promoter in Batey 9, said that in addition to bringing children to the clinic, parents often bring sick children to her home, where she gives them a serum made of three spoons of sugar, a pinch of salt and a liter of clean water. She doesn't prescribe medicine because she doesn't have any.
When Feliz's nephew, 6-month-old Diego Antonio Perez Feliz, came down with a severe case of diarrhea, his mother took him to the hospital in Tamayo. The mother, Virginia Feliz Santana, said that even though she buys drinkable water for the baby, he vomited and had diarrhea for five days.
“The fever increased after three days. He was really sick; he had hard stomachache,” Feliz Santana said. “With all this happening, I felt the pressure increasing in me.”
Doctors could not tell her precisely what sickened her baby, just that “it was a virus that was around,” she said.
Batey 9 resident Osmila Torres, 2, drinks Coca-Cola. Her mother bought the Coca-Cola for 15 pesos, or about 40 cents, in order to soothe the child’s sore throat. By comparison, five gallons of purified water from the batey’s grocery store costs 35 pesos, or about 90 cents.
Osmila Torres, 2, drinks Coca-Cola from a cup. The drink cost 15 pesos, or about 40 cents. By comparison, five gallons of purified water from the batey’s grocery store costs 35 pesos, or about 90 cents. Photo by Lindsay Erin Lough
Not every batey resident will go to the hospital, even if they are desperately ill. Some fear of being caught by immigration authorities at military checkpoints – there are two between the bateyes and the hospital in Tamayo, said Tomas Leyba, the head of the Red Cross in Independencia.
Most batey residents are Haitian or of Haitian descent and considered undocumented under a Dominican law that has overturned birthright citizenship. Nearly half of the population in bateyes 7, 8 and 9 is undocumented, Enecia said.
The Dominican Republic has a universal health care system that provides basic medical treatment free to all, but there are still some expenses – including medications – that some residents can’t afford.
“I was buying all the drugs. I was buying everything,” said Feliz Santana of her baby’s hospital stay.
But Enecia, whose center provides health assistance to poor residents of the bateyes, said the real issue is how to prevent illness in the first place.
“You not only get sick because you drink the (non-purified) water directly. A lot of times, it’s because it is misused after it comes out of the faucet,” said Enecia, who said water is often stored in dirty containers.
A lack of sanitary restrooms plays a part in the spread of waterborne diseases. Only one in five Independencia homes had a bathroom in 2007, according to the statistics office. Most families – 55.20 percent – had access to latrines, but 23.75 percent did not have access to any kind of toilet.
“A lot of people don’t have bathrooms or latrines . . . and they defecate outside,” Julis said. “It’s something that we’ve been trying to eradicate for several years."
Other realities, like the presence of animals and children wandering naked in the village, increase chances of diarrheal diseases as people are more likely to be in contact with excrement. The lack of plumbing in the bateyes promotes the spread of cholera, diarrhea and dengue, a mosquito-spread disease, said Miguel Carvajal, an engineer for the National Institute of Potable Water in Independencia.
Community efforts to improve the situation face numerous challenges — money being one of the biggest.
A woman washes clothes with the free but untreated water from a village tank in Betey 9. Because the tank is sealed on top and cannot be opened to be cleaned, the water becomes contaminated with bird feathers, dirt and other objects.
A woman washes clothes with free but untreated water from a village tank in Batey 9. The water sometimes becomes contaminated with bird feathers, dirt and other objects. Photo by Lindsay Erin Lough
“The majority cannot buy bottled water, so we explain to them how to put drops of chlorine in a gallon of water – five drops of chlorine for a gallon of water – or how to boil it before they give it to the children,” said Ramirez Aquino, the clinic nurse.
But Batey residents often don’t follow recommendation to chlorinate water, said Carvajal. Some are plain resistant.
Dieula Blanc, a Haitian woman who moved to Batey 9 after the earthquake, refuses to chlorinate her water and simply drinks it as it comes out of the tap. Blanc is afraid that if she gets used to filtered water, she will get sick when she returns to Haiti, where she drinks from the river.
Morin, the agricultural worker, said he is used to drinking water from the batey’s tank but his wife, Jean, frequently feels sick. She has had dizzy spells, intense headaches and stomachaches for nearly five years. But they have little choice. The Morins live in a dark and decayed hut. There is no sink in their kitchen. They store water in a plastic bucket and cook with charcoal. They say they can't buy water on his income of about 200 pesos a day – about $5.20.
“A lot of times, people don’t have the 30 pesos (about 80 cents) once every two or three days to buy water,” said William Decena, pastor for a local church. That's the price charged by the water-selling truck that comes from Barahona on Tuesdays, Fridays and Sundays; a gallon at Batey 9’s grocery costs several times that much.
A new water-purifying system has been built behind the church with help from G.O. Ministries, an American nonprofit. A gallon of the church's water is less than 3 cents and 5 gallons cost 5 pesos – about 14 cents.
Yonei Feliz Cuevas, who purifies and sells the water, said a hut-by-hut educational campaign was launched to inform residents of the new system and some are taking to it. Up to 40 families a day now buy water from the new system – and Cuevas said he has had to stay at the church at night to keep water thieves away.
But not everyone is convinced. And change comes slowly here – even for the man in charge of the new water system.
On the same day that water began to be sold behind his own church, Decena bought two gallons outside Batey 9. He had forgotten that cheap, pure water was now available in his own village.

SEE:http://cronkite.asu.edu/buffett/dr/unsafe_water.html

Do you know guy?


Do you know guys?
The material that industries use for making the bottle for storing water that we drink is PET one of most toxics chemical in the world, so could be dangerous for us , if we see the bottle you can observe a symbol like:  

Tapped documentary




I was surfing in internet and I got some informations about tap water and bottle water, and somebody recommended this documentary called Tapped. It so interesting, and I hope that you express what you think about it.

Bashful and Shyness



Since I was 1 year old my mother´s friends are used to looking at me like a shy person, I used to be recent and aloof toward to another children of my same age, so I started to think that it was truth, because I am used to being along at home watching the TV. When I was 15 or 18 years old it was same, so made few friends who were dancing or drinking while I was doing the same every day.

Nowadays I think they are wrong, because I always tell what I think or what I fell. I can´t deny that in some cases I felt afraid when I socialize with another people when I meet them for first time, because I don´t feel comfortable talking about me, but when I deeply meet someone they think that I such a crazy person in a good sense, so I recognize that I can be bashful and shy.  

Sugar, Sugar

I love this song. It´s so  beautiful  and I didn´t know what was its  such a sweet title until I listene  my boyfriend singing with his cellphone.

These are good guide for learning how to use So And Such


So / Such

The following is a mini-tutorial on the use of "so" and "such." After you have studied the tutorial, complete the associated exercises. If you already know how to use "so" and "such," you can skip the explanation and go directly to the exercises.

So + Adjective

USE

"So" can be combined with adjectives to show extremes. This form is often used in exclamations.
Examples:
  • The music is so loud! I wish they would turn it down.
  • The meal was so good! It was worth the money.

USE with "That"

The above form can be combined with "that" to show extremes which lead to certain results. The "that" is usually optional.
Examples:
  • The music is so loud that I can't sleep.
  • The music is so loud I can't sleep.
  • The meal was so good that we decided to have dinner at the same restaurant again tonight.
  • The meal was so good we decided to have dinner at the same restaurant again tonight.

So + Adverb

USE

"So" can be combined with adverbs to show extreme actions. This form is often used in exclamations.
Examples:
  • She spoke so quickly! She sounded like an auctioneer.
  • He paints so well! I am sure he is going to become a famous artist.

USE with "That"

The above form can be combined with "that" to show extreme actions which lead to certain results. The "that" is usually optional.
Examples:
  • She spoke so quickly that I couldn't understand her.
  • She spoke so quickly I couldn't understand her.
  • He paints so well that they offered him a scholarship at an art school in Paris.
  • He paints so well they offered him a scholarship at an art school in Paris.

So + Many / Few + Plural Noun

USE

"So" can be combined with "many" or "few" plus a plural noun to show extremes in amount. This form is often used in exclamations.
Examples:
  • I never knew you had so many brothers!
  • She has so few friends! It's really quite sad.

USE with "That"

The above form can be combined with "that" to show extremes in amount which lead to certain results. The "that" is usually optional.
Examples:
  • I never knew you had so many brothers that you had to share a bedroom.
  • I never knew you had so many brothers you had to share a bedroom.
  • She has so few friends that she rarely gets out of the house.
  • She has so few friends she rarely gets out of the house.

So + Much / Little + Non-countable Noun

USE

"So" can be combined with "much" or "little" plus a non-countable noun to show extremes in amount. This form is often used in exclamations.
Examples:
  • Jake earns so much money! And he still has trouble paying the rent.
  • They have so little food! We need to do something to help them.

USE with "That"

The above form can be combined with "that" to show extremes in amount which lead to certain results. The "that" is usually optional.
Examples:
  • Jake earns so much money that he has lost all sense of what a dollar is worth.
  • Jake earns so much money he has lost all sense of what a dollar is worth.
  • They have so little food that they are starving to death.
  • They have so little food they are starving to death.

So + Much / Little / Often / Rarely

USE

"So" can be combined with words like "much," "little," "often," or "rarely" to describe how much or how often someone does an action. This form is often used in exclamations.
Examples:
  • Earl drinks so much! It's not good for his health.
  • My sister visits us so rarely! I really miss her.

USE with "That"

The above form can be combined with "that" to show the results of extreme actions. The "that" is usually optional.
Examples:
  • Earl drinks so much that it is starting to interfere with his work.
  • Earl drinks so much it is starting to interfere with his work.
  • My sister visits us so rarely that my kids wouldn't even recognize her.
  • My sister visits us so rarely my kids wouldn't even recognize her.

Such + Adjective + Noun

USE

"Such" can be combined with an adjective and a noun to show extremes. This form is often used in exclamations.
Examples:
  • Don has such a big house! I think it's a little ridiculous.
  • Shelly has such beautiful eyes! I have never seen that shade of blue before.

USE with "That"

The above form can be combined with "that" to show extremes which lead to certain results. The "that" is usually optional.
Examples:
  • Don has such a big house that I actually got lost on the way to the bathroom.
  • Don has such a big house I actually got lost on the way to the bathroom.
  • Shelly has such beautiful eyes that she got a job as a make-up model.
  • Shelly has such beautiful eyes she got a job as a make-up model.

NOTE

Remember that without the noun you need to use "so."
Examples:
  • such beautiful eyes that
  • so beautiful that

Such + Judgemental Noun

USE

"Such" can also be combined with judgemental nouns for emphasis. This form is often used in exclamations.
Examples:
  • He is such an idiot! He says the stupidest things.
  • She is such a genius! We could never do this work without her.

USE with "That"

The above form can be combined with "that" to show certain results. The "that" is usually optional.
Examples:
  • He is such an idiot that nobody would hire him.
  • He is such an idiot nobody would hire him.
  • She is such a genius that they immediately gave her a position at the university.
  • She is such a genius they immediately gave her a position at the university.

Such + Noun (This type of...)

USE

"Such" can also mean "this type of..." or "that type of..."
Examples:
  • The archeologist had never seen such writing before he discovered the tablet.
    this/that type of writing
  • She usually doesn't receive such criticism.
    this/that kind of criticism
  • Frank has never made such mistakes before.
Link:

http://www.englishpage.com/minitutorials/sosuch.html

Rihanna Ft. Drake Take Care

I´ve loved and I´ve Lost.....
That Truth Hurts and Those Lies Heal......

Grammar: WISH statements ¨´´Expressing Unreality´´

-Use the verb WISH when you want to express unreality. A desire for reality to be different or a regret that  it was not different...

When you have Present and Future WISH: Use WISH + WOULD or COULD.

Example:        Can you speak Mandarin?
                      -No, but I WISH I COULD.
                     
                      Will it snow next monday?
                      -No, but I WISH it WOULD snow.

                     
                                                          Present WISH: WISH+Past form of the verb.

Example.         Do you smoke too much?
                      -Yes, but I WISH I DIDN´T smoke so much.
                     
             
                                                         Present WISH: (Verb To BE) -When you have Verb TO BE use WERE.....

Example:         Are you still buying everything you see in the stores?
                       -Yes, but I WISH I WEREN´T buying everything I see.

                       Are you giving up smoking?
                       -No, but I WISH I WERE giving up smoking.

                                               
                                                  Past WISHES: Use WISH + HAD +Past Participle.

Example:         Did they know that the Internet could be addictive?    
                       -No, but they wish they had known.
                      Were you hooked on Football as a teen?
                       -Yes, and I WISH I HADN´T BEEN hooked on Football.
                      Has she been in Constanza?
                       -No, but she WISHES she HAD BEEN.


                                          Past WISHES: COULD: WISH +COULD HAVE + Past Participle.

Example:        Could you finish your homework before midnight yesterday?
                      -No, but I WISH I COULD HAVE finished before midnight.



                            
   


Holy week or Easter


Easter is the Christian annual commemoration of the Passion, Death and Resurrection of Jesus of Nazareth. Therefore, it is a period of intense activity within the various liturgical Christian denominations. Begins on Palm Sunday and ends on Easter Sunday, but his celebration usually starts in several places last Friday (Viernes de Dolores) and is considered part of the same Resurrection Sunday.

The date of the celebration varies (between March and April depending on the year). Easter is preceded by Lent, which ends in the Passion Week where we celebrate the Eucharist on Holy Thursday, commemorates the crucifixion of Jesus Holy Friday and the Resurrection during the Easter Vigil on Holy Saturday night to Sunday Easter.

During Easter occur numerous samples of popular religion throughout the world, highlighting the processions and representations of the Passion. The holiday cycle that corresponds to Easter in other countries, like the United States of America, is known as "Spring Break".

wikipedia information.






Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Elderly


It is very interesting how in another countries elderly people are seen, because here in The Dominican Republic, they are sometime seen like someone that just has to be sitting down in a old chair seeing what is happening while they wait for some money for keeping their needs. They are not protected here, in much of the case you can see them walking in the streets in bad condition and working hard. There are places where old people can be when they don´t have family, but we are live in a corrupt country where only rich people have access to those places and I know because my old uncle couldn´t be there, for he was poor.


Toast to the tap the water we drink

Drinking Water Quality: What You Need to Know

Most of us don’t think about the water we drink. We turn on a tap, fill a glass, and drink. But how much water do you really need to drink every day? Is the water you're drinking safe or would bottled water be safer? What can you do if your tap water suddenly became contaminated? Read on to find out how much you know about the drinking water in your own home.

Drinking Water Quality: What You Need to Know

How Much Water Do You Need?
Your body weight is more than 50% water. Without water, you couldn’t maintain a normal body temperature, lubricate your joints, or get rid of waste through urination, sweat, and bowel movements.
Not getting enough water can lead to dehydration, which can cause muscle weakness and cramping, a lack of coordination, and an increased risk of heat exhaustion and heat stroke. In fact, water is so important that a person couldn’t last more than five days without it. So how much water do you need? Enough to replace what you lose daily through urination, sweating, even exhaling. And your need for water increases:
In warm or hot weathe, With vigorous physical activity, such as exercise or working in the yard, bouts of illness, especially if you have a fever, are vomiting, having diarrhea or coughing.

Water Quality: Is Tap Water Safe?

You need to stay hydrated --  that’s clear -- but is the tap water in your home safe? It is considered generally safe if it comes from a public water system in the United States, such as one run and maintained by a municipality. The Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) has the authority to monitor all public water systems and sets enforceable health standards regarding the contaminants in drinking water.

:::::BOLD AND BASHFUL:::::

BOLDNESS..... Opposite of being SHY. A Bold person maybe willing to risk shame, or rejection in social situations and willing to bend rules of etiquette or politeness...(Wikipedia)

SHYNESS.... (Also called DIFFIDENCE) Is the feeling of apprehension, lack of comfort or awkwardness experienced when a person is in proximity to, approaching, or being approached by other people... (Wikipedia)


                        ¨´Spare the road and spoil the Child and no advice could be better¨´ (Bible)


-As no matter than simple bad habit Shyness is not the worst feeling that a person can experiences, in my opinion Boldness is a bad as Shyness is.
A person who is Bold is generally Audacious Insolent; and cocky (Too sure of oneself). It acknowledges no checks on its freedom and generallu is without shame.

           
                          -Some people can be obnoxiously BOLD and AGGRESSIVE.

                                                        - BOLDNESS-
                                               -Take too much for Granted
                                       -Over confidence.                 -Insolence.
                                             -Fearless.                     -Nerve.

TO PREVENT BOLDNESS IS: INSTRUCTIONS -STRICTNESS (NO STRICT) AND DISCIPLINE.

-SHYNESS: is of interest to me because it is closely related to lack of confidence which often leads into an INFERIORITY COMPLEX.
High anxiety in social situations heart races, hands perspire. ETC.
SHY person avoid social situations.

-In the United States, SHYNESS is perceived as a problem that needs to be overcome.

It´s not clear how to prevent SHYNESS, there are, however, some ways to lessen the effects of SHYNESS.

-SHYNESS can be mistaken for being standoffish or unfriendly, a SHY person has to come out of his or her shell in order to avoid being labeled negatively.....

I got this information about THE for you, my friends


The definite article - the

The definite article the is the same for all genders in singular and in plural.
the boy, the girl, the cat, the computers
If the following word begins with a vowel, we speak [], if the following word begins with a consonant, we speak [].
[][]
the following word starts with a spoken consonantthe following word starts with a spoken vowel
the girlthe English girl
the bookthe orange book
the schoolthe old school
the unit
Here a [] is pronounced at the beginning of the word.
the uncle
Here a [] is pronounced at the beginning of the word.
We have listed some examples in the following table. There you can see when we use the definite article and when we don't.
without the definite articlewith the definite article
Life is too short.
I like flowers.
I've read a book on the life of Bill Clinton.
I like the flowers in your garden.
Peter and John live in London.
Aunt Mary lives in Los Angeles.
The Smiths live in Chicago.
Mandy doesn't like school.
We go to school by bus.
Some people go to church on Sundays.
The school that Mandy goes to is old.
The bus to Dresden leaves at 7.40.
The round church in Klingenthal is famous.
Germany, France;
Mount Whitney, Mount McKinley;
Africa, Europe;
Cairo, New York
the United States of America, the Netherlands; the Highlands, the Rocky Mountains, the Alps; the Middle East, the west of Australia
Corfu, Bermuda, Sicilythe Bahamas, the British Isles, the Canaries
Central Park, Hyde Park;
Lake Michigan, Loch Ness;
42nd Street, Oxford Street
the Statue of Liberty, the Tower (of London), the Isle of Wight;
the Atlantic (Ocean);
the Mediterranean (Sea);
the Nile, the Rhine, the Suez Canal
The weekend is over on Monday morning.
July and August are the most popular months for holidays.
I always remember the Monday when I had an accident.
The August of 2001 was hot and dry.
We use the seasons of the year (spring, summer, autumn, winter) with or without the definite article.
in summer or in the summer
The American English word for autumn >fall< is always used with the definite article.

Sometimes we use the article and sometimes we do not. It often depends on the context. Watch the following example:
The student goes to school.
The mother goes to the school.
In the first sentence we do not use the definite article, in the second we do. The student goes to school for its primary purpose, so we do not use the article.
The mother might talk to a teacher, for example. She visits the school for a different reason. That's why we use the definite article in the second sentence.

http://www.englisch-hilfen.de/en/grammar/artikel.htm

I know how difficult an addiction is. It doesn´t matter if It´s about sex, gambling, alcohol even computer.  I have known about people addicted to alcohol, so I know the consequences, the attitude with another people for felling better, maybe it is almost the same when you see a person addict to internet and you see how the life of that person chance.
In my Case when I waste a lot time feel bad and lost, because I trying to look for  that can make me feel good, but nothing is good when you are alone at the end  everything turn different  as the way how you are with another people.

the Internet and other Addictions


 I was looking for information about this topic, and it was very  easy to find it. That is one Idea about how seriously we have to take it, because we live in a world that change very fast.
Hey!!!! professor I´m so sorry about my problem with the Blog.
Today when I came home I turned on the computer with my old Gmail, but It didn´t work again  . I wasted  a lots of time trying to be online every single day, so It was a nigthmare, so let me tell that I checked the new one, and I watched you invitation since one week, but Im sure that it wasn´t there  last time when I cheked it.

thank you!!!

Sunday, March 24, 2013

How to Overcome Shyness


How to Overcome Shyness

We’ve both experienced different variations of shyness, and through practice and increased awareness we have both overcome this. The following are tips that have helped us overcome this uncomfortable feeling.
shyness3.jpg
Photo by Lauren

1. Understand Your Shyness

Seek to understand your unique brand of shyness and how that manifests in your life. Understand what situation triggers this feeling? And what are you concerned with at that point?

2. Turning Self Consciousness into Self Awareness

Recognize that the world is not looking at you. Besides, most people are too busy looking at themselves. Instead of watching yourself as if you are other people, bring your awareness inwards. Armed with your understanding of what makes you shy, seek within yourself and become the observing presence of your thoughts. Self awareness is the first step towards any change or life improvement.

3. Find Your Strengths

We all have unique qualities and different ways of expressing ourselves. It’s important to know and fully accept the things we do well, even if they differ from the norm. If everyone was the same, the world would be a pretty boring place.
  • Find something you are good at and focus on doing it. An identifiable strength will boost your natural self esteem and your ego, helping you better identify with yourself. It is a short term fix, but will give you the confidence you need to break your self-imposed barrier of fear.
  • See how your unique strength gives you an advantage. For example, Amanda is a naturally quiet person who prefers to spend time alone. She learned that she listens better than others and notices things that others miss in conversations. She also discovered that her alone time has given her a better understanding of herself.

4. Learn to Like Yourself

Practice appreciating yourself and liking the unique expression that is you. Write a love letter to yourself, do things you enjoy, give gratitude for your body and its effortless functions, spend quality time getting to know yourself, go on a self-date.

5. Not Conforming

Trying to fit in like everyone else is exhausting and not very much fun. Understand that it is okay to be different. In fact, underlying popular kid’s public displays of coolness, they too are experiencing insecurities, self-consciousness, and awkwardness. Accept that you may not be perceived as the most popular social butterfly, and you may not want to be either. At the end of the day, being popular will not make you happy. Accepting your unique qualities can set you free.

6. Focus on Other People

Rather than focusing on your awkwardness in social situations, focus on other people and what they have to say. Become interested in learning about others, and probe them to talk about themselves. You can try pondering the question while interacting: What is it about this person that I like?

7. Releasing Anxiety through Breath


Anxiety and fear can feel overwhelming if you are practicing to become more assertive in order to overcome this fear.
  • One simple technique to calm this anxiety into manageable bites is taking deep breaths with your eyes closed, whileconcentrating on just your breaths. Inhale and exhale slowly while clearing out all thoughts.
  • Another technique is from yoga: counting as you inhale and then as you exhale. Slowly leveling out your inhale and exhale duration. Example, 4 count for in and 4 for out. Once your breaths are leveled, add an extra count during your exhale. This means slowing down your exhale by just a tad as compared to your inhale. Continue for a few minutes until you are comfortable, than add another count to your exhale. You can easily do this in the bathroom, or in a spare room of when you need it.

8. Releasing Anxiety through Movement

One way of viewing anxiety is that it is blocked energy that needs to be released. We can release this energy through physical movement.
  • Exercises like jogging or walking will help to re-channel some of the blocked energies, but also helps by pulling you out of the situation and shifts your state of mind. This refreshed state of mind will help by adding perspectives to things.
  • Another effective technique is a simple muscle meditation/exercise. Sit down or lie down. Bring awareness to every part of your body, starting from your toes and moving up your body to the top of your head. At every part of your body, tighten the muscles at the center of awareness for 3-5 seconds, and then relax. Repeat this until you get to the top of your head. Remember to breathe.

9. Visualization

Visualizing yourself in the situation as a confident and happy person helps to shape your perception of yourself when you are actually in the situation. Close your eyes, sit back somewhere relaxing, listen to some relaxing music, imagine yourself in a scene or situation and see yourself the way you would like to be. In this scene, how do you feel? What do you hear? Do you smell anything? Are you moving? What do you see? Get all your senses involved to make it real.

10. Affirmation

Words can carry incredible energy. What we repeatedly tell ourselves, gets heard by our unconscious mind, and it acts accordingly. If we repeatedly tell ourselves that we are incapable, and too shy to do anything, we will become increasingly aware of evidence to back up this ‘fact’, and our actions will always match what we tell ourselves. Similarly, if we repeatedly tell ourselves that we are capable, confident, and wonderful human beings, our unconscious mind will likely surface the awareness that gives evidence to this new ‘fact’. While, we can’t lie to ourselves, positive visualization and affirmation are helpful in placing us along the road of positive thought patterns.

11. Do Not Leave an Uncomfortable Situation

When we leave shy situations, what we are really doing is reinforcing our shyness. Instead, face the situation square in the face. Turn thefearful situation into a place of introspection and personal growth. Become the observer and dig into yourself, answer the questions:why do I feel this way? What caused me to feel this way? Can there be an alternative explanation to what is happening?

12. Accept Rejection

Accept the possibility that we can be rejected and learning to not take it personally. Remember, you are not alone and we all experience rejections. It is part of life and part of the learning process. The key lies in how you handle rejections when they come. It helps to be mentally prepared before they happen:
  • Never take it personally. It was not your fault. It just wasn’t meant to be. The scenario was not the best fit for you.
  • Find the lesson – what did you learn? There is a lesson ingrained in every situation. And through these life lessons lies the potential for you to become a better person, a stronger person. Nothing is lost if you can find the lesson. See these as the blessings in disguise.
  • Move on. Recognize that when you fall into self-pity, you are not moving forward. Nothing will be changed from your self-pity. When you start to recognize this, it becomes clear that only energy is wasted while we feed to our problem-seeking ego. Pick yourself up, dust off the dirt and move on to the next thing. Try again, try again, try again. It will pay off!

13. Relinquish Perfectionism

When we compare ourselves, we tend to compare ourselves with the most popular person in the room or we compare ourselves with celebrities we see on TV. We set excessive expectations by comparing ourselves unreasonably to people unlike ourselves and wonder “why can’t I be that?” We carry with us a vision of another’s perfection and expect ourselves to fit that exact mold. And when we don’t fit, we beat ourselves up for it, wondering why we are such failures. You see, the problem lies in our emphasis on fitting into a vision we have created in our minds, which is not us. Let go of this perfect image, create visions of yourself out of the Being from who you are, naturally; and let that expression flow, naturally.
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Photo via g2slp

14. Stop Labeling Yourself

Stop labeling yourself as a shy person. You are you, you are unique, and you are beautiful. Can’t we just leave it at that?

15. Practice Social Skills

Like any other skill, social skills can be cultivated through practice and experience. The more you put yourself out there, the easier it becomes next time. If you have a hard time knowing what to say, you can practice what to say ahead of time.

16. Practice Being in Uncomfortable Situations

Sometimes, it is not the social skills we lack, but rather the lack of self confidence that we may succeed, and a heightened fear that we will fail. Placing yourself in these uncomfortable situations will help to desensitize your fear towards the situation. The more you force yourself to face it, and to experience it completely, you will realize that it is not that bad after all. It may be hard for your ego to accept at first, but quickly you will find that you can just laugh and enjoy it.

17. The Three Questions

During social settings where you may experience nervousness, periodically ask yourself the following three questions. Doing so will distract yourself from more self-destructive thoughts. Make it your mantra:
  1. Am I breathing?
  2. Am I relaxed?
  3. Am I moving with grace?

18. What is Comfortable for You?

Going to bars and clubs isn’t for everyone, and that’s okay. Understand what feels comfortable for you, and find people, communities and activities which bring out the best in you. You can be just as equally social in settings that you connect with on a personal level, than the popular social settings. You don’t have to be doing what “everyone” else is doing. Besides, everyone else isn’t necessarily happy, despite your perception as such.

19. Focus on the Moment

Becoming mindful of what you’re doing, regardless of what you’re doing, will take focus away from the self. When you are having a conversation, forget about how you look, focus on the words, fall into the words, become absorbed in the words. The tones. The expression. Appreciate it and give gratitude for it.

20. Seek and Record Your Successes

As you overcome this condition we’ve been labeling as shyness, you will have many wins and realizations about yourself. You will gain insights into the truth behind social scenarios. You will start to view yourself differently and come to recognize that you can become comfortable and confident. When these wins and realizations happen, make sure to keep a notebook and write them down. Keeping a journal of your successes will not only boost self confidence, but also shift your focus towards something that can benefit you.